Opinion: The Perfect Quarterback Boy Band

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There is nothing better in pop music than a boy band.

If you claim to dislike NSYNC, the Backstreet Boys or One Direction, you are probably lying to avoid embarrassment. You should not be ashamed to like formulaic pop music with kiddy-pool depth. Men should not be afraid to be a member of a fan base largely comprised of teenage girls.

Still, it is understandable why some men would hide their admiration for five good-looking gentlemen who sing angelic harmonies. So, I have constructed a boy band with the perfect blend of sharp looks and alpha-male testosterone – a boy band of quarterbacks.

The Poster Boy – Green Bay QB Aaron Rodgers

Every boy band has their Justin Timberlake, their Harry Styles. The leader of the group that always seems to sing the hooks and date the models. They perfectly fit the image of a boy band leader: Handsome with slight ruggedness, humble yet confident, and dedicated to the group while having enough individuality.

Aaron Rodgers is the poster boy of what a quarterback should be. He has the look, size, arm strength, and confidence necessary to be the leader of a team. He also happens to be one of the more marketable players in the NFL, and dates model Olivia Munn.

The Energetic One – Carolina QB Cam Newton

There has to be a flamboyant, charismatic, energizer-bunny member in a boy band. Not necessarily the best singer, but the one who puts in maximum effort at all times through his dancing and outgoing personality.

Cam Newton fits this description perfectly. The league MVP might not be the most orthodox thrower, but he is both effective and entertaining at the same time. Newton provides the dance moves (the dab), the energy, and the killer smile that keeps the boy-band engine going during grueling world tours, the same way a quarterback keeps a team going through a grueling season.

The Bad Boy – Cleveland QB Johnny Manziel

What is a boy band without edge? You cannot have a boy band with no backbone. The bad boy is able to defend the band from hostile fan bases, while also presenting a mask of unpredictability.

Johnny Manziel is the league’s current bad boy. He shows constant defiance towards the responsibilities of a starting quarterback and refuses to listen to positive advice. His appearance on Sunday is just as unpredictable as his off-the-field behavior.

The Sensitive One – Seattle QB Russell Wilson

Sometimes the poster boy is too perfect. Sometimes the energetic one is annoying. Sometimes the bad boy is too…well…bad. That is when you need the sensitive member of the group. The sensitive member understands you. He knows your pain. He writes the songs for YOU.

Russell Wilson proved he had a sensitive side during his 2014 NFC Championship postgame sob fest. Wilson is in touch with his spiritual and emotional side. His calming tone and inviting smile make him the perfect sensitive figure for a boy band.

The Irrelevant One – San Francisco QB Blaine Gabbert

The irrelevant one sings sometimes, but we all know he has no potential for a solo career. Blaine Gabbert plays quarterback sometimes, but we all know he has no potential at being a franchise quarterback.

Featured image courtesy of Eva Rinaldi.

The opinion of our writers/bloggers are not a reflection of the opinion of the Tennessee Journalist as a whole.

Edited by Jessica Carr